Stubborn Mortal That I Am...

I was thinking again about how hard it is for me to keep quiet during some discussions. I tried reading my own "Silence is Golden" post (August 30, 2011). Then I began trying to find here-and-now examples of people I look up to in this area of life. Perhaps I can follow their lead.

One who comes to mind is my DM. Mom passed on in '94. However, her last few years, in her early 70s, she confided to me that one of the hardest things she had to do was to learn to shut up when nothing else made sense. She said that sometimes all the talking in the world will not fix a situation and she had to learn to "see" those situations and just keep quiet. How hard that was for her. My mom, like me, couldn't help speaking up when she felt she could help in a situation.

Another who I remember is my dear old friend, Jane, who passed on two years ago. During her 70s, like my mother, she realized that arguing with her beloved only son, then in his 40s, just did not resolve any issues. She, too, confided in me. She said that when she realizes what is happening, she just tightens her lips and looks out a window. She felt the stress of a useless argument just wasn't worth it.

Yet one more woman I admired for this ability is the mother of a dear friend. She is still alive. When she was in her late 70s (what is it about the 70s?), she and I talked one day. She was having a hard time remaining quiet when her grown daughter did something that made this woman feel compelled to share her insight. She said that she had finally understood that it wasn't worth the conflict or tension that resulted when she spoke up.

Thinking about these three made me think about myself. I loved them each in their own special way. I could try to follow their lead. No, not "could" - I "should" follow their lead. They were each wise but stubborn in their own way. I am equally stubborn - I'm not sure about the "wise" part.

However, they each managed to be successful in their attempts. Me? I'm not only equally as stubborn as each one, I fear that I am even more stubborn than all three put together.

So, tonight, I realize I have some good examples in some people I have known. They changed their attitudes as their lives changed around them. I do think about doing it, too, but I need to do it more often. I did put some quotes in a file shortcut on my desktop. I do look at those each morning when I turn on the PC. Now I just need to keep it up. If they could do it, I'm sure I can, with the Lord's help.

Once more, my Lord, I ask for the grace and gifts I need to learn how to keep my mouth shut when it does no good to open it. Distract me, if you must. Whisper to me, if you think I'll hear. But most of all, love me enough to help me, and enough to forgive me when I stumble along the way.