Yet, when I try to say something that happened to me, I am fluffed off with a "Yeh, well get to the point." The point is that I need to give a tiny bit more background for someone to understand some of what I have to share. An argument or hot discussion starts because I feel I have a right to speak, also. But the more I state this, the more I am seen as the "cause" of the argument, so I end up shutting up.
I allow this person to tell their stories or whatever happened to them, in their own time and in their own way. I tend to expect the same consideration.
I can see that I cannot change this person. Here's where that tried-and-true prayer that everyone has heard of because of AA, the Serenity Prayer, is useful. Because I cannot change this person, I must accept this person as they are.
However, I must also stop thinking of myself as "suffering in silence." That is not accepting - that is resenting. And that causes internal stress, which I see as wasteful and even harmful to my health down the line. So, how can I handle this?
First, I suppose, I need to stop as soon as I see that a "situation" is brewing. Then I need to say a prayer for that person, that they begin to accept that others have opinions, too. Finally, I need to remind myself that Jesus himself had much more important things to say and share than I have, and he was shut down time and again toward the end, and I need to follow his example and just accept this person.
The good thing is that, unlike this person, I have many, many friends and acquaintances and I can freely share my thoughts and stories with them, either by email, or phone, or yes, by blog.
Dear Lord, thank you for blessing me with this insight, but I will need a lot of help to continue with my goal of avoiding stressful arguments with this person; please help me to become quicker at defusing these situations, and remind of what your son would have done.