Anyhow, we were sitting outside, quietly, at the street-end
of my driveway. It was now dark. Occasionally a car came down the street.
Occasionally, a plane or chopper droned above us. She watched for little crawly
things. I just watched. And I thought.
I am truly happy. I cannot figure out why or how or what
I've done to deserve it, but I must acknowledge it - I am truly happy and
content.
That might seem strange to some who know the issues I face
constantly. There are so many things I need to do to this old home. There are
so many debts I'd truly love to have off my back. But those are external
things.
I am talking about true contentment.
I truly, truly miss
some dear old friends and loved ones, folks who have left this earth for a
better place. There are still holes in my heart. But they are happy holes
because when the feeling comes over me, I have so many happy memories.
And I have my faith. I think that's what it is all about. No
matter how much the external troubles might pile up, they always work out.
Those that do not always turn out to be things that needed to be dealt with and
tossed anyhow.
It's true I have occasional aches and creaks and I limp and have other little physical issues. Mine are minor compared to so many of my dear friends who are battling major health issues right now.
I am blessed with this laptop still working, a backup tower
that will connected in a week or two, food in the fridge and freezer, gas in
the car, a still-running car (even though it's almost 16 years old), a roof
over my head, hot and cold running water, a washer and dryer that still work
and are inside this old double wide mobile home (I still remember the decades
of going to coin laundries), the Oak Ridge Boys singing to me on a VCR tape I'm
playing on the old analog tv with the built-in VCR, and more - so much more.
Again, these are external joys.
Lord Jesus, thank you so much for having always been there
for me, for having sacrificed for me and for everyone else, for the peace you
bring to me if I do not shut you out. Please look kindly upon those I care
about who are still on this earth, and if it be according to the Father's plan,
fill them, likewise, with this peace, the peace that surpasseth all
understanding!
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